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HOLY Bipolarness, Batman

November 5th, 2007 1 Comment · bipolar, Borderline Personality Disorder, depression, drugs, Health Related, holistic healing

UGH I hated the visit with my psychiatrist today. I am going to switch. I went back over our entire visit in my head, and it just PISSED ME OFF more. Yes I said MORE. He didn’t listen to what I said that didn’t fit into the criteria for bipolar, he just put me in as… get this:

ULTRA RAPID CYCLING BIPOLAR

ummm… NO!

I know what bipolar is from extensive research and talking to the people who actually have bipolar about their symptoms. You, my sweet and wonderful readers, have shared in my journey to the one thing that encompassed my symptoms. You all know what I’m talking about.

I told him I don’t want to do the drug thing, but he is bound and determined to get me to at least LOOK at the drug option… but for BIPOLAR drugs. I told him I’m doing natural stuff and he is like “but it’s not regulated by the FDA” and I’m thinking, the FDA even puts drugs out and a few months later recalls them because they are unfit to be in our bodies.He (upon my insistence) gave me a stack of pamphlets about a load of different drugs. Then he tells me some of the side effects and what I would have to get done to check on my body systems… you know… to make sure the drug (or drugs) is not killing me. He was saying at least 3 have the potential to give me liver damage.

JESUS LORD GOD… are you flipping serious?

When he was doing that neurotic looking eye blink, he was discounting what I said. He gave me a worksheet I had to fill out to see if I fit the criteria.. For most of them I had to add notes in the margins. Do you think he read them?

Uh… NO. He just classified me without taking it ALL in. Every book on his shelf, every pamphlet for drugs, was for Bipolar.

Then when I questioned him even further into that… about borderline and how come he didn’t come to that conclusion, he ends up saying “their characteristics overlap and sometimes a person can have both”. The more questions I asked about the contrast between BPD and BD, the more flip flopping and squirming he did. He has to understand… I’m not some unlearned chick that will accept without a word or question what you say. You have to PROVE it to me.

He kept trying to make my symptoms bigger than they were. I would say I feel like I can do a lot of things on the upswing…he would keep saying “like you could conquer the world” and I said NO. He didn’t listen. That was all down the criteria line. UGH UGH UGH

Now I am switching my doctors. I just called and they are like “it’s a long drawn out process” >>> WTF??? SO WHAT. I have to change. He just is NOT listening. I have another appt with him in 2 weeks to talk about DRUGS, not about what’s really wrong. I don’t think that appointment will go well once I tell him he is dead wrong and why.

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