The Meltdown: Panic of the Soul
Welcome back. This week Anxiety is on the menu. Check out the symptoms of Anxiety and take a listen to see how it affects people like me. We get a little into the background of what makes me who I am and how other people’s actions have affected my personality.
What else is there? Compulsive behaviors, [...]
It Always Rains
It Always Rains when I am supposed to meet with my therapist.
I told my mother earlier that the weather said it wasn’t going to rain Friday. I told her I didn’t believe it, that by tomorrow it would be raining. Lo and behold, the forecast has changed and it WILL rain tomorrow. Every single time [...]
Impulse: Downloading
I have a ridiculous need to download things sometimes when I am having an impulse control issue. Today I was rather agitated due to so many things going on with my Internet friends. What did I do? I downloaded the Flock browser and all the components that I could get that were compatible from my [...]
Psychiatrist today : Dun dun DUN!!!
I have an appointment with the ‘chiatrist for the first time ever today at 2:30. I am TERRIFIED. He is just a professional man doing his job, right?
Not in my psyche, he isn’t.
I have no control over what this man does to me within the confines of his little office. No, he cannot prescribe me [...]
Being alone and lonely
It’s gonna be another lonely night
one more and I’m gonna die
wired out waiting for the sign
coz your a risk and im borderline
Michael Gray – Borderline
As weird as it sounds, that song came to me this morning, o I thought I would look up the words. There, the first verse says it all. Last [...]
Im so Sick
Today is a rough day for me. Every day leading up to my husband going to training has been rough. Saturday it started getting unbearable. I flipped out and cried over a pie. A FRIGGING PIE >_< Then Sunday night, after we had a good day….I started in with anger and fear. I got anxious [...]
Appt rescheduled BY THEM
O
M
G
Now I have to wait till October 12th. She is supposedly sick. I think she took a mental health day for herself.
This is not good.
Agitated and distraught doesn’t even cover the platitude of my emotional upset right now.
The doctor at 1pm today
I would be totally lying if I didn’t say that I am nervous. I am nervous… and angry. I will be sure to tell the doc that I don’t appreciate the long wait to be seen. I will probably ask how many patients commit suicide before they are seen by the doctor. She probably won’t [...]
Insecure
Sometimes I find that I look at women and think “God, why am I not as beautiful?” or “Why won’t my hair stay shiny and pretty like that?” I have such issues on and off with this. Sometimes I feel like the most sexy, beautiful person. Then other times I see all these young, gorgeous [...]
Silence = judgment?
Sometimes I will write things about myself on different forums where I feel safe to share some of my most intimate thoughts. Sometimes, those thoughts are completely ignored. I feel like it’s some type of silent judgment they are passing on me, like they are thinking the worst of me because of what I wrote. [...]
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