BULLETPROOFsoul » depression

Christ based program about depression

Bulletproof Soul — Tue, 30 Nov 2010 04:11:10 +0000

Can Your Thoughts Really Destroy You and Your Family?

My answer:

YES.

Listen to this podcast…

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In the weeds once again

Bulletproof Soul — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 23:15:58 +0000

This time it’s more of a fight than it has been…almost ever…I would fathom.

Why?

Well because this time I have no physical way out. I don’t cut anymore. I don’t hurt myself when I’m overwhelmed. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. NOTHING…. So the only thing I have left is prayer and meditation… trusting that God will do something miraculous so that this temporary situation will subside and my life will start again.

Not having a way out and trusting God with everything is no easy task. When I get into the weeds of my mind, I have to continually beat down the thorns as they try to overtake my state of being. I have to continuously remind myself that there is a way bigger purpose for this holding pattern.

One day it will be realized…one day soon… the worse the depression tries to overtake me, the closer I know I am to the breakthrough.

The Meltdown: Sexual Affliction

Bulletproof Soul — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 15:48:21 +0000

Today I deal with some issues in the news and the sexual affliction that periodically plagues me and my relationship.

Mentioned in the podcast:
Stuck with the Stigma
Treatment for Borderline
Study about genetics
Natural remedies for bipolar and depression

Music:
Human Nature
You Are Not Alone
Man In The Mirror

RIP Michael Jackson

The Meltdown Podcast: Depression Monster

Bulletproof Soul — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 13:00:09 +0000

In this return episode of The Meltdown Podcast, I talk about depression rearing its ugly head. I also have a little chatter about women’s issues *sorry guys* toward the end. There are a lot of things going on in my life right now, so I figured I would share them with you all.

I also have shot outs to people who have lost loved ones recently. It’s hard to lose someone you love!

I am using my brand new studio mic and a new version of Audacity, so if it sounds funny please give me a learning curve break here

Mentioned:
In The Rooms Recovery site
Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyer

Songs used:
The Fray –
You Found Me & Hundred

How to Save a Life
Casting Crowns – Set Me Free

Mental Monday: Tired of people

Bulletproof Soul — Mon, 04 May 2009 18:26:05 +0000

There are times when I get tired of being around people. Some may call me a sociophobe or even a sociopath at times. I come to intervals in my life when all I want to do is be alone and secluded. I don’t want to be connected to anyone or anything. It doesn’t happen nearly as often as it once did. I still feel sort of detached from the world most of the time. It’s almost like running a robot with remote control sometimes. I know I can’t be the only person that ever felt this way.

Emergency Meltdown: Holiday Blues

Bulletproof Soul — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 05:35:47 +0000

As requested, The Meltdown visits ways to prevent and cure the holiday blues.

Mentioned site: Dr N A Dig

Music: Christmas Time is Here from Charlie Brown Christmas

Having a hard time with this podcast

Bulletproof Soul — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 17:18:12 +0000

I keep picking up my mp3 player and putting it back down again. I keep thinking of what to say and just negating it that fast. So much has been going on and so much has been remembered. So many people I love have passed on and so many people are just not around to talk with for whatever reason short of death. I am weighed upon so heavily and I just can’t seem to break out of this depth where I lay. Please forgive me for being late with this podcast. I will post it today, that is a promise. … Just give me time. Thank you.

Impulses: Lost gusto

Bulletproof Soul — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 22:01:46 +0000

It sucks to know that you only a few short months ago enjoyed doing something so much that it overtook your dreams. That’s how it was with me and my knitting. I was totally obsessed. Now, I pick up the needles, do a few stitches, and just walk away again. It is really frustrating. I am hoping and praying that as the time draws nearer for woolly scarves and mittens, that my fervor will return. I fear that it will not and I will have amassed all these supplies for nothing.

Just like I returned to my guitar, but with less gusto than when I picked it up the first time…I have yet again put it down and walked away. I WANT to do these things, but they are just not calling me.

And even now with a book I was reading. I have 1/2 inch out of a 3 1/2 inch thick book left to read, but I cannot bring myself to read it. I keep starting new books, hoping that it’s just a phase…but even those books are going half read.

The worst is with cleaning my house. I am forcing myself to do what has to be done, but I would rather do it with joy. I have been fighting off this unfounded depression for over a month. It started slowly, months ago, and began to creep across me like quick sand. When you stop thrashing around you don’t stop sinking, but you only sink more slowly. Now I’m stuck, looking for a vine to pull me out of the mire.

I keep praying about it… and forcing myself to do the things I yearn to feel the want to do… I just hope that the want comes back soon.

The Meltdown: Choose Your Mood

Bulletproof Soul — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 22:32:38 +0000

Here I am in all my barely speaking glory talking more about the previous post on choosing your mood. Can you choose? What factors play into it? Can you let go and become better instead of bitter? Find out.

I also send a shot out to my mother for her birthday today!!!

Music: Black Wave by The Shins .. and a special thanks to my buddy Meko for suggesting this PERFECT song.

Choose your mood

Bulletproof Soul — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 15:25:34 +0000

RPM loves the idea of choosing my mood and not letting it choose me.

That’s what she said. My reply: I wish I could do that more often. A lot of times we are unaware that we are choosing to be in a (for lack of a better word) PISSY mood. My therapist and I have been working on my reactions to things and how I allow or do not allow them to overtake the entire experience of something.

For instance, we went to a wedding in Rhode Island. We had an AWESOME time, but there were 3 events which made me feel like crap and come out with a pissy attitude. Now, I could have decided not to let all of them overshadow the great time. Believe me, I tried. I said to myself on more than one occasion to just let it go and enjoy myself…and for the most part I did. It’s just that when everything was over with, that pissy attitude really took over and I just could not seem to shake it. I hated saying I had a great time BUT…

I had to get over it so that I could only revel in the good things that happened while we were away. I hate that my attitude automatically shifts into crap gear. My therapist and I have talked about WHY this happens and I am dealing with it. More on that in Monday’s podcast.

Yes, I found my mp3 player.